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I'm a radiologist and writing helps me make sense of the world.

"My method is to take the utmost trouble to find the right thing to say, and then to say it with the utmost levity" -George Bernard Shaw

Tuesday 5 January 2016

Radiological Aptitude Test

It is that time of year where junior doctors across the UK are pondering their future career. Some are considering applying to become a radiologist. Have you got what it takes? Answer the following questions and find out!

1. Do you like starting work before 8am?
a) I am an owl; I don’t do mornings
b) With enough caffeine, I can just about do it
c) I am the rooster; I love being at work before 6am

2. Some doctors like to give medicines to ill people. Do you?
a) So long as they’ve got either barium or iodine in, I’m fine with that
b) Oooh, now we are talking. I love pharmacology!
c) I know 3 antibiotics, will that do?

3. How much do you like needles?
a) My favourite form of pointy metal; I'm fond of a spot of Voodoo
b) Argh! All pointy! Absolutely not!
c) A lot. I know several types of stitch and like my thread absorbable.

4. Do you like wires?
a) Hmm, long and thin. Love them!
b) They obviously have a mechanical role but they don’t excite me
c) Urgh! Give me 3 inches of steel any day

5. And, on the subject, what about long, thin and rigid plastic tubes
a) The longer and more rigid the better!
b) Hmph? Why would these interest me?
c) Not at all. I like my plastic tubes large bore and of medium length

6. Do you get excited by the thought of >1000 litres of liquid helium?
a) Ooooo! Sorry, I just have to change my underwear
b) It is interesting enough, theoretically
c) Not at all. Damnable egghead stuff

7. How do you feel about the dark?
a) I love it; black is my favourite colour
b) It has a role. At night, generally
c) I like bright lights and am nyctophobic*

8. What sort of books do you tend to read?
a) Detective novels; Sherlock Holmes is my hero
b) Esoteric and obscure fiction
c) Preferably books that you can colour in

9. What sort of films do you like?
a) They have to be black and white; I find colour so false
b) Documentaries or anything factual
c) Anything with sharp blades and lots of blood in it!

10. What garments do you like to wear at work?
a) A two-piece lead/rubber apron with matching thyroid shield
b) Anything tweedy
c) Blue pyjamas every time

11. When 5pm comes, are you?
a) Out the door and already fighting traffic
b) Still bogged down with paperwork and scut
c) Generally getting into my stride, sending for the last case

12. Do you like taking a patient’s history?
a) A few brief questions to get the headline issues. I like it short and snappy
b) Ooooh! The diagnosis is all in the history. It is so important
c) Next you’ll be saying I have to touch them as well as talking to them

Mostly A – excellent! You should apply for radiology right now!
Mostly B – hmmm. You’d be better off as a physician or possible a GP
Mostly C – ahem. I think you surgery is calling you.

*nyctophobia - fear of the dark

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